bleh i just realised that there are actually people who read this blog/ link this blog I THOUGHT NOBODY READ THIS SHITTY THANG, MY GOODNESS. tonight was/is? horrible. its so freaking late but i dont want to sleep i keep staying up and thinking of stupid shitty things (thangs ahhaha) and my fever is not getting better and i'm sneezing every freaking minute bleaggghhh.

i think i understand now. dreams know your worst fears, and they'll keep replaying it over and over again in your head until you finally succumb and break down. horrible horrible dreams.

shit i sound so high, you guys probably think i'm on drugs or smth. ew.

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along, yeah
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved


this song is really old, but now that i'm older and whatnots i guess you can really see the meaning of the song and whatnots, which makes it even more beautiful. i feel like some kind of crybaby, dammit. i wish everything was as easy as it some make it out to be - that things wouldn't change over time, that people wouldn't go. but no, the cold hard truth is that things do change, and people do go. its just so pathetic that i would even feel this way. 

i stared, and the first thing that came to mind was "cause the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly". such beautiful lyrics, doncha think? :)
 

 there was some lj thing about unsent letters, and i thought it would be pretty cool to do some. ( not here obv) but maybe in a diary or something, or maybe my secret blog where i do random lyrics posts all the time ( oh wait i do that here too don't i). but point is, there's so much to say, so many people to say those words too, i wouldn't know where to begin. my parents, my friends, everyone i've let down before... yeah you get the drift. 

is it possible to run out of tears to cry? or does someone just become numb to everything after a while? i would really like to know. i think at this point in time, my hearts something like a fountain of tears, but on the outside i just can't cry. so, goddamn, numb.

 why do i always have to be subjected to this? do i deserve the tears until 1 in the morning?

no not tonight, not tonight. 

TOMG obsession again o.o

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, 
But there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into.

ah the normal papers are over, and being the ultimate slacker i am, i'm not studying for geog ra. prolly gonna fail but ah well. i shall go there and tikam something. :P haha. other than that. i'm just feeling so. blank. there's really no proper word to describe this. lonely? maybe i'm just bored. i don't know. emo songs just seem to appeal to me now T_T

sometimes i wonder if you really do mean what you say.
but tonight, i will lay my head down
and sleep till a new tomorrow

 rain, rain, go away
come again another day, 
all the world is waiting for the sun

and all i could ever do, was to lie here under you. 
breathe in, then breathe out.

 i'm sitting here waiting for hell knows what.

( Read more... )

i'm so stressed from hssrp so i picked up the book and went to find a nice excerpt, then i remembered this one :) from The Pact by Jodi Picoult, one of my favourites out of all her books. The last line of that excerpt especially. 

damn, where's the ipod to emo with when you really need it. 

 So maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one

new favourite song, i mean BLG featuring taylor swift? that has got to be too cool. yes love drunk is finally out and i just got it yest when dad wanted to get the new BEP album ( yes i know my dad listens bep -.-). can't wait for paramore's new album, i think it'll be cool :) 

oh yeah this post is going to appear in caps in that horrible font again, livejournal screws up when i copy lyrics. 

i'm feeling kinda emo tonight, doesn't really show above huh? prolly cause school is starting, dunno. or maybe cause you're not here. 
or maybe it's the kinda emo blg song playing now. 
weird. 

sprite, chili and ice cream! :D
fun fun i'm so high yay but i just realised school is starting next week but nevermind, when i'm happy i shall be happy! 

and not having disney channel has got to be illegal somehow, how can anyone not grow up with disney channel and healthy positive teenybopper icons like hannah montana who'll turn out just like lindsay lohan??

five five five five five 

to the person i found out has an rss feed to my blog :

 common weaknesses ftw? ;)

xo

 honey why're you crying, is everything okay?
it's funny that you're calling me tonight
and yes i've dreamt of you too.

hmm i guess this is not something worth worrying about, but you know, when it does hit you. you can't help feeling a bit worried. feeling.. nostalgic? is something missing? or was it never there from the start?

whoo PPAs for T3 are over, baby :) say hello to partying on the beach, relaxing on the sea shore, counting stars...

not. i am feeling extremely unwell after the papers today. and also..

unfortunately, since my name starts with A and i happen to always be register number one because people like alicia tan are no longer in my class, i am ALWAYS the first one going to present for stupid speeches and pts and everything D: SUCKS TO BE ME. i am so unprepared for ss speech, gonna die gonna die i don't want to die shizz. but then after tmr i should be relatively free throughout the week to do random other stuff then i really should revise for chem/physics spa next friday, since i conveniently flunked chem mock spa with a positively horrid score of 8/16 ( kill me nao). i think all the stress is going to my head, sarah says i'm going nuts and making too many random comments or noises or actions in class. when i go crazy i hope somebody will sue MOE on my behalf so at least my parents can get some form of monetary er repayment (?)

hey i just realised this is my first proper non-emo ( oh wait it kinda is), non-lyric post in a very long time. hah, i shall dedicate this to my darling janne then, since she worries so much about me and my emo blog :)
FOR YOU JANNEYPOO :)

kk its time for ss pt and me, ttfn :)

 and the entire morning, 
i sat there.
waiting.  
it never did happen. 

so here we are now
in a place where
the sun blended with the ocean thin
so thin, we stand 
across from each other
together we'll wonder if we'll last these days


this is turning into a big mess
maybe it's time for someone to go 

 cold, cold water bring me 'round
now my feet won't touch the ground

coldplay obsession haha. school work is secretly stressing me out but i'm still slacking and trying not to show it. well. sorry for not posting properly too, everything something post-worthy happens i forget to post and i only get around to posting when i'm emoing about anything/everything. yes sorry for the emo-ness, i know it's bloody annoying but this is the only place i can write. and write. screw you if you don't like what i write, y'know? 
......
and this is how everything will begin. and one day when you wake up, everything will be over. 
don't let my faith waver.

 
and high up above or down below
when you're too in love to let it go
but if you never you'll never know
just what you're worth

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and i will try to fix you 

he tells me about his night
i count the colours in his eyes 
he'll never fall in love he swears
as he runs his fingers through his hair

brings back memories, but i think memories should stay where they are. 
don't say we didn't try cause we did.